overdose

feels sian.

Why should I feel discouraged
Why should the shadows come
Why should my heart feel lonely
And long for heaven and home

When Jesus is my portion
A constant friend is he
His eye is on the sparrow
And I know he watches me

I sing because I’m happy
I sing because I’m free
His eye is on the sparrow
And I know he watches me

ETA:

k, was feeling real down just now. thank god for songs that are down and depressing. like that one above. (don’t be fooled by the lyrics. it sounds quite sad actually).

ok, i’m officially pissed off at my life. someone once said to me, eh, why your blog got nothing but choir huh? well you know what? cos my life is nothing but that. sounds pathetic? it is. not that i don’t like choir or anything. i do. i’m just really tired. ok, i admit, i skipped church choir today. partly cos i wanted to practice luk luk (i really did). partly cos i think i’ll lose my voice pretty soon. and cos i’m just sian of singing liao. there’s a saturation point with everything and i kind of think i’ve reached that point.

*and stupid wordpress doesn’t allow me to skip more than one line at a time.* grrr… and did you know wordpress i can’t change the size of the font either??! What I See Is What I Get?! bullshit. i see a big blank space. what do i get? one line of blank space.

i feel like skipping the bbq tonight. stay home and watch the muppets. but then, mum’s supposedly starting work at a new place on monday and she wants me to plan her lessons FOR her. hello? she’s the one with the diploma in childhood education, not me. i only have what, 7 modules in English Language. tis not my job to plan out what you have to teach. i’m not getting paid either. for the record, if you don’t want to do the preparatory work, DON’T BE IN THIS INDUSTRY. so anyway, it’s to my advantage to be out of the house tonight.

you know something interesting about the fanfics these days? the two active ones on GCA both talk about suicide. very strange why the mood seems to be tending towards that these days. whatever.

i’m in a leave-me-alone-to-rot mood.

oh and btw, because it’s so hard to use the WYSIWYG thing, i might change blog again. sick of getting pissed off because i can’t make the post the way i want it to look.

~ by mezzogal on June 23, 2007.